I can barley remember a time that I didn’t know you. And even though you’re an important part of my life, I have to wonder if it’s not best to part ways.
I thought supporting you would be good for me. But let’s face it, I’m not the only woman you’re involved with. I get the attraction. Brown and sweet. But lately when you’re around I think I’m too into you. But do you feel the same about me? Likely not. I want to believe that you still stand for the greater good. On the other hand, I am beginning to wonder if you really are good for me. I have become selfish in your presence. I don’t want to share you with the kids. And of course, not with other women.
I didn’t want this to be public, but I realized that many others are aware of this situation already. Plus, they probably notice the change in me; one minute I am excited to see you then next-not so much. When others question me, I tend to downplay your impact on me. As if the weight gain isn’t a big enough clue.
Maybe it is time for a break. Just for awhile. We could try a year. It’s not me. It’s you. Yes, Thin Mints, it’s definitely you. So, until this time next year, we may need to take a break. By then I may be able to work off the ten pounds you helped me gain. By then I’ll have more money to spend on you. By then I’ll have that warm fuzzy feeling you gave me the very first time we met. Don’t worry. I’ll explain it to the kids. The milk and I will be just fine.
*The above was for satirical purposes only. In no way, shape, or form would I suggest I, or you, not support buying gobs of the best cookies, from thousands of tomorrow’s female leaders. Get your own box. Or fifty. Yeah. Go figure-there’s a site just for that. https://www.girlscouts.org/en/cookies/all-about-cookies/How-to-Buy.html